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Edited by Jenny Na (jenny@groovekorea.com) COvER STORy www.groovekorea.com / September 2014 42 complex legal process often means that the financial responsibility is often carried by the mothers alone. When Choi’s son was born, she made it clear that she would only respect the father’s right to see the child if he fulfilled his respon- sibilities. “He gave me money for about three years when he was young, about 700,000 won a month, but there were times when he did and times when he didn’t,” she says. He maintains a relationship with the child, and might buy him something if he needs it, but he has since stopped paying child support and Choi has no way to compel him to do so. In addition to the financial burden, Choi also faces discrimination at work, and knows oth- er unwed mothers who have been fired after giving birth. The women aren’t the only ones facing dis- crimination — their children are often target- ed as well. Choi, whose story has been widely reported in the Korean media, says her son had to change schools last year because he was being teased by his classmates. “When he was in his first year of elementary school, other children kept asking about rumors they had heard about me being an unwed mom and he became a sort of outcast,” she says. “Other kids were told by their parents not to play with him because he was in an unwed mothers’ home.” She says unwed moms need to show that they are raising their children well by coming forward in society and defying stigmas. “We chose to raise our children and should not be thought of any differently or in a bad light be- cause of that decision,” she says. “We should be respected as any other person is respect- ed to raise our child in peace.” Unwed mothers also need support because, she says, they aren’t the only ones who have a role in raising their children. “Society does too.” The lack of support essentially forces wom- en to give up their children, Mok says. “And if that’s the case, then in the end the children will end up in adoptive homes, foster fami- lies or in child welfare facilities. And in any of those three situations, they are getting more support from the government than we are.” Compared to the 70,000 won per month that unwed mothers receive, she notes that foster families receive a monthly stipend of 500,000 won, child welfare facilities such as orphanages get 1.05 million won per child per month and families adopting domestically receive around 150,000 won per month for each child up to 14. Mok uses the metaphor of a broken cup to illustrate her point, saying, “Instead of investing money after the cup’s al- ready been broken, (the government) should invest it in keeping the child in a healthy envi- ronment with its parents. The amount would be less than what they’re currently spending, and isn’t that a better investment?” According to Mok, the women who are giv- ing up their children for adoption are not doing it because they don’t want to raise their kids. “It’s because they don’t have any other choice — especially if the child’s father will not help support, if the parents will not help support … then they really have no other choice. We need to get rid of this public atmosphere that encourages these women to send their chil- dren for adoption.” Mok says agencies claim that women relin- quish their children because they want better lives for themselves. In her experience, that’s not the case. However, she acknowledges there are moments when the difficulty of rais- ing a child alone can wear on a person, and it’s in those moments of insecurity or stress that a woman may feel adoption is the only choice. “Some of these women could get on their feet financially if they were given the chance and the support, but they’re not able to get that,” Mok says. “If society were to allow that moment (of insecurity) to exist and worked to protect the woman, more women could keep their children. B ut society takes advantage of that moment and in effect forces the mother to choose adoption.” pAper orphAns And the BABy Box Revisions to the Special Adoption Law in 2011 aimed to shift the focus of the country’s adoption system to promote the preservation of original families, in line with international standards. It enforces a mandatory seven-day reconsideration period for expectant mothers in the wake of numerous reports of coercion. One woman’s baby was reportedly taken by an agency worker who had her sign relin- quishment papers while she was still under anesthesia after delivery. The law will also ban adoption agencies from providing facilities for unwed mothers by 2015. Mok says the law provides mothers with an extra legal barrier to help protect their right to parent their own child. The seven-day deliber- ation period “gives women one more chance to think practically about whether or not they can raise their kids,” she says. “Before, moth- ers were being asked to sign off on adoption before they even gave birth, so they weren’t truly considering whether they could raise their kids. They were being told that it wasn’t possible to raise their child, and they were just accepting it.” An audit of Holt Children’s Services of Ko- rea in June found the agency to be in violation of the adoption law in a number of areas, in- cluding the deliberation period. Although the agency had followed the law for 567 of 600 children born after the law went into effect in August 2012, 33 children were taken from their birth parents before the seven days had passed. The audit also notes that before the law went into effect, 78.7 percent of children sent for adoption, or 1,022 out of 1,299, had been taken from birth parents within seven days. The new law also enforces birth registration as a way to prevent abuses in the adoption system. In many countries, it’s illegal to adopt a child unless he or she is an orphan. This is also true in Korea, but adoption agencies have often created “paper orphans” to facil- itate adoption, cutting all ties between child and family. Proponents of the law are con- cerned that a child who is not registered would have no legal protection. Yet some mothers have been unwilling to register their child’s birth, fearing discrimina- tion. It is estimated that about 3,000 children of unwed mothers go unregistered each year. The government doesn’t list the status of the women who are giving up their children for adoption are not doing it because they don’t want to raise their kids. ‘it’s because they don’t have any other choice, especially if the child’s father will not help support, (and) if the parents will not help support … then they really have no other choice. We need to get rid of this public atmosphere that encourages these women to send their children for adoption.’ mok Kyoung-hwa